“Grab hold and
pull! You can stretch 13” STRETCH ARMSTRONG up to four feet. Squish him,
scrunch him, stretch him out. He always
returns to his original shape, ready for any wild position kids can think of!”
--Ad
copy describing the capacity and capabilities of the unique action figure,
Stretch Armstrong.
One
of the most popular (and no doubt strangest…) toys of 1976 was Stretch
Armstrong, from Kenner.
Essentially, Stretch is a muscle-bound,
blond-haired “hunk” (garbed only in briefs…) who -- because he came filled with
dark-colored “gelled corn syrup” -- could be stretched, pulled and tied into
the aforementioned “wild positions.”
Stretch Armstrong’s toy box implored kids to “stretch him long…watch him return to shape again!” Sometimes, this advice was followed too
closely…
Stretch
Armstrong -- soon to be the subject of a major motion picture, apparently --
became so popular in the late 1970s that other “stretch” creations were added
to his universe in the years 1978 and 1979.
These included the ultra-cool Stretch Monster, described as having “green scaly skin, devil’s eyes, and a
half-man, half-lizard look,” Stretch X-Ray, and for the little ones,
Stretch Octopus.
Today,
it is exceedingly difficult to find an original Stretch Armstrong who hasn’t
been bled out or otherwise mishandled. I
had a Stretch Armstrong as a kid…for about five minutes, but always really wanted
the Stretch Monster, who seemed very menacing and cool, and who would have been
a perfect villain to combat Steve Austin or Jaime Sommers in Kenner’s Bionic
line..
Below,
some commercials for Stretch and his adversaries.
My cousin had a Stretch Armstrong coloring book. It showed Stretch Monster going to the circus and enjoying a cotton candy while seeing the circus acts. That sold me. I wanted Stretch Monster... and got him for Christmas.
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