Saturday Morning Cult TV Blogging: Return to the Planet of the Apes (1975): "Flames of Doom"

With Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes (2024) due in theaters in a few short weeks, it seems an appropriate time to remember a more obscure corner of the simian-verse.

Return to the Planet of the Apes (1975) is a Saturday morning TV program developed for television by David De Patrie and Fritz Freleng. 

It assimilates and re-invents characters, plot lines, devices and technology from all previous incarnations of the franchise, including the Pierre Boulle novel, the 1968 film and sequels (Beneath, in particular), and even the short-lived 1974 live-action TV series.

The result is an invigorating and unique shot in the arm for the franchise.

The premiere episode of Return to the Planet of the Apes, “Flames of Doom,” (by Larry Spiegel), finds a NASA space capsule called the “Venture” traveling on a routine deep space mission on August 6, 1976. 

Aboard are three astronauts: Bill Hudson (a white man), Jeff Allen (an African-American man) and Judy Franklin (a woman). 

Bill narrates the captain’s log and confirms Dr. Stanton’s theory of “time thrust;” that man can utilize faster-than-light speeds to propel himself into the future. Admirers of the 1968 film will recognize this comment as a reflection of Chuck Heston’s opening narration, and Dr. Hasslein’s theory named there. It’s been simplified for children in this cartoon, but the idea is the same.

No sooner has Hudson informed us about this scientific theory than the ship’s chronometer goes wild and the Venture plunges into a time warp. The “Earth Clock” goes crazy, and the Venture arrives battered and bruised in the year 3979, where it crashes on a strange planet, and into a dead lake.

Meanwhile, elsewhere on the surface  – in a city ruled by intelligent apes – General Urko, a gorilla power-monger, addresses the Supreme Council of Ape City and demands genocide against all humans. 

Arguing the opposite case is the kindly chimpanzee Cornelius, who pleads for a “different course.” He and his wife, a behavioral scientist named Zira, wish to study humans as the key to “simian origins.” Arbitrating this dispute of national importance is the ruler of the apes, an orangutan named Dr. Zaius. 

I must note that the level of attention to detail in this scene is remarkable.  

For as Zaius issues his decision on the matter at hand, the edit cuts to a stone relief on the wall behind him which reveals the long history of ape-human relations. There are images of apes hunting humans and even domesticating them.

Humans may be hunted as legitimate sport, Zaius concludes, or brought into the city to perform “menial tasks.” They may even serve as domestic pets, but Zaius will not demand their total destruction.

However, on an ominous note, he warns that Article 18 of the “Book of Simian Prophecy” demands that man must be destroyed at any cost if he develops the power of speech. In other words, this is a temporary victory for Cornelius’s cause, and for the primitive, mute, stone-age humans who populate caves outside the technologically advanced ape-city.

Watching this portion of the episode, a few matters become plain. First and foremost, the franchise has returned to the ape society as depicted in Boulle’s original novel. In other words, the apes dwell in a twentieth century city with television, radio, automobiles and the like. 

Their city is not a rock-outcropping like in the popular original movie, but rather a contemporary metropolis with buildings and skyscrapers that resemble those from human history in a wonderful nod to the adage “monkey see, monkey do.” The ape culture of the original film was almost medieval, despite the presence of guns and such medical advances as brain surgery. Not so here.

For instance, the imposing ape council building resembles nothing so much as our own Capitol Building where Congress deliberates when it isn't shutdown. Since this is a re-imagination and updating of Planet of the Apes for the mid-1970s, not only is there the burgeoning nod to gender and racial diversity (this was the era of the equal rights amendment...) in the make-up of the astronauts, but the focus on the Council and its proceedings reveals a more bureaucratic bent to the apes.

Instead of ape culture being essentially of one mind (as in the see-no-evil/hear-no-evil/speak-no-evil triumvirate of the Schaffner film showcases), here Ape society is bedeviled by partisan politics, with chimpanzees representing the pacifist left, gorillas the militant right, and orangutans the sensible center. This is especially important considering the context of Return to the Planet of the Apes: immediately post-Watergate and soon after the Vietnam conflict. Again, this is an example of updating and changing a franchise, but not throwing out the baby with the bath water.

Continuing with the story, Bill, Jeff (voiced by Austin Stoker of Battle for the Planet of the Apes and Assault on Precinct 13), and Judy abandon their sinking spaceship and flee into the Forbidden Zone. Recalling the portions of the original film shot in Death Valley, the series offers an artistic montage here as the three astronauts search for water and food under the glaring sun of what they believe is an alien world.

The animated frames turn a bright scarlet hue to represent the heat of the desert and there are close-ups of human faces caked in sweat. Close-ups of tired feet marching in the sand also appear. This montage doesn’t rely on dialogue, but rather on clever images that express an emotion. 

The animation is limited perhaps, even crude but these limitations are marshaled as a strength on the program. Overlapping views, double exposures, intense close-ups, insert shots and first person subjective point-of-view shots all provide a texture to the desperate march through the wasteland. 

This march ends, appropriately, with the sighting of an Ape Mount Rushmore. Another new touch, but again one that along with the ape metropolis reveals the ape talent for mimicry (monkey see, monkey do) and is therefore thematically valuable; a subconscious reminder that all of the simian accomplishments are built on “aping” human society.

Later episodes go further with this idea, visiting "The Tomb of the Unknown Ape" or mentioning the famous author, William Apespeare.  One episode, "Invasion of the Underdwellers," even casts eyes on -- at least briefly -- a simian Mona Lisa.

In the desert, Jeff and Bill lose Judy when fires spontaneously erupts in front of them, and an earthquake splits the ground in a series of lovely frames that reveal a high degree of fidelity to images from Beneath the Planet of the Apes (particularly Taylor’s abduction by the underground mutants). 

The astronauts have little time to ponder the loss of their companion, however, as Bill and Jeff encounter a tribe of stone age humans, including the beautiful Nova.

Suggesting an interesting mystery, Nova wears the dog tags of another astronaut, someone named Brent (again, a reference to Beneath the Planet of the Apes). 

His birth date was May 2, 2079, so Jeff and Bill are forced to ponder the notion that an astronaut who was born after them arrived on the planet of the apes before they did. Boggles the mind, no? 

This is a pretty advanced concept for a kid’s show, and it also provides an underlying mystery for adults to enjoy. Where is Brent? What happened to him? 

Before long, the apes arrive, on the hunt,  in tanks, jeeps and with heavy artillery. The gorillas even lob gas grenades at the primitive humans. Here, the series utilizes zooms inside individual frames (not actual motion, but rather camera motion…) to suggest the frenetic pace of the hunt. Jeff and Bill are separated, and Bill is captured and taken to Ape City.

That’s where the first episode ends, but already, the attentive viewer can detect how this canny re-imagination assimilates the critical aspects of the Planet of the Apes mythos with something akin to 20/20 hindsight.

Instead of making up the saga as it goes (a deficit of the otherwise outstanding motion picture series…), Return to the Planet of the Apes accounts for -- from the very beginning -- the mutants in the Forbidden Zone (here termed “The Underdwellers.”) It also employs familiar characters in new ways and in  new situations, and even incorporates movie imagery to vet the story. 

In terms of characters, Urko derives from Mark Lenard’s character on the 1974 TV series. In Beneath, a similar character was known as “Ursus.” He is essentially the same ape here, as are Zira and Cornelius, but Dr. Zaius has changed the most. 

Zaius is no longer a hypocritical religious zealot, but rather an equalizing force of moderation in Ape Society…almost heroic, actually.

“The free ape is he who does not fear to go to the end of his thought,” he even states; an ideal that the original movie’s “chief defender of the faith” could never get behind.

This is actually a significant structural change as well as a symbolic representation of the left/right divide in our culture. Why? Because with Zaius moderating pacifists and war-mongers, we can more logically believe that humans (particularly the astronauts) can continue to escape and outmaneuver a technologically advanced simian culture. The whole planet isn’t out to kill them; they do have allies.  Dr. Zaius is even referred to by his enemies, the Underdwellers, as being "just...for an ape," and again, this is a sea change in the character's depiction.

From the original Planet of the Apes movie, “Flames of Doom” also incorporates other powerful visuals. We see the ape scarecrows on the border of the Forbidden Zone again, and, on a connected note, hear the same gorilla “hunt” horn on the soundtrack. We see a small, yellow rubber raft and a U.S. flag planted in the Forbidden Zone too, as well as the discovery of a first green plant indicating life on the fringe of the desert.

Again, the approach here seems to be to this: take what worked in the apes movie, book and TV series, and then put them all together in a more coherent, cohesive story, smoothing out the bumps and making everything jibe. 

That’s important, because long time Planet of the Apes fans will remember some of the more dramatic gaps fouling continuity in the film series. In Planet of the Apes, for instance, it is the year 3978 when Taylor arrives, but when Brent arrives on his heels in the follow-up, Beneath, it is magically 3955.

Similarly, there are discrepancies between Escape and Conquest in the story of how the apes ascended to superiority in man’s world. Cornelius’s story involves an ape named Aldo (whom we meet in Battle), but does not take into account the true ape revolutionary, Caesar.  Coming at essentially the end of the apes cycle, Return to the Planet of the Apes benefits from knowing everything that came before.

Indeed, this is the only valid reason for the re-imagination of a franchise. Taking what worked in one production and maintaining it; and taking what didn’t work and improving upon it. It must be done, however, with a degree of love, patience and restraint involving the material. I feel like I see all that here.

Notice that there is not merely change for the sake of change; that characters have not miraculously and randomly switched sexes, and whole swaths of mythology have not been removed or altered to suit a developer"s ego, or need to be "creative."

What I’m suggesting is that fundamentally there is a respect in evidence here for the the productions that came before, for the Apes mythos. So yes, a re-imagination can work, and this dedicated animated series is one example, at least in its first chapter, where it did so.

None of this means, however, that Return to the Planet of the Apes doesn't sometimes lapse into childishness and silliness. The series was made, after all, to air on Saturday mornings in the 1970s. The intended demographic was young children. This factor plays out in some funny ways throughout the series.

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: "Make Room for Big Daddy"

When they break Big Daddy's shell-o-vision set, Blurp and Slurp decide to run away and move in with Sigmund, who has just been given an old TV set for his club house residence.

When Sigmund's brothers take over the club-house, they play the TV much too loud, earning the ire of the nosy neighbor, old Miss Ettles (Margaret Hamilton). 

In attempt to get rid of Slurp and Blurp, Johnny (Johnny Whitaker) and Scott (Scott Kolden) leave a not for Big Daddy about where to find his sons.  Big Daddy runs the monsters off, but then decides he wants to live in the clubhouse, himself.

Johnny tape records the voice of Sweet Mama, finally, to scare off Big Daddy. 

But more problems arise: Miss Ettles has called the sheriff over the noise from the TV in the clubhouse.

"Make Room for Big Daddy" is a fun episode of Sigmund and the Sea Monsters that, much like other episodes, features the sea monster family more prominently than it does Sigmund. It is clear that the Sea Monsters have become the most popular, and most utilized characters on the series. Here, they set up residence in the Club House to enjoy the television.

Margaret Hamilton guest stars in this episode, and her final scene in the episode sees her coming face to face with Sigmund screaming in terror. Of course, Hamilton is best known for playing a monster, herself. She portrayed the Wicked Witch in The Wizard of Oz (1939).

Otherwise, this story continues the series gag of featuring monster-related TV programs and films. Big Daddy wants to watch a movie called The Godzilla-Father (The Godfather [1972]), and a TV show called The Cod Squad.

Next week: "It's Your Move."

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: "Sweet Mama Redecorates"

Things go awry in the Sea Monster family cave when Sweet Mama demands new furniture to spruce the place up, and Big Daddy does not want to pay for replacements. The brothers come up with the idea to steal the furniture from Johnny and Scott's house instead.

The monsters swap Zelda's furniture with their rock furniture, causing a crisis for the human family. Sheriff Bevins is called in to stop the burglaries, but is unable to do so.

Meanwhile, back at the cave, Sweet Mama decides she does not like Zelda's furniture after all, and wants all new rock furniture. A frustrated (and cheap) Big Daddy thus issues the boys an ultimatum. If they pay him 100 clams (the price for new furniture), he will return Zelda's belongings.

"Sweet Mama Redecorates" is a fun episode of this classic Sid and Marty Krofft live-action series though, for the most part, it sidelines the titular character. Sigmund is hardly in this segment at all.  Instead, the focus is largely on the Sea Monsters, and Zelda and Sheriff Bevins have bigger than normal roles as well.

Sigmund's scene sees him expressing sadness at the thieving and bad behavior of his family. "I'd like to resign from the sea monsters, and become a porpoise," he declares.

Otherwise, the episode features some mildly humorous moments, including Zelda's description of the sea monster furniture as "early American rock pile."  

The Sea Monster TV show of the week is a soap opera called "As the Werewolf Turns." And another funny moment sees the monsters trying to figure out what an ironing board is. Big Daddy mistakes it for a bed.

Next week: "Make Room for Big Daddy."

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973-1975): "The Curfew Shall Ring Tonight"

In “The Curfew Shall Ring Tonight,” Sigmund nearly gets caught by Zelda (Mary Wickes) while eating a sandwich in the kitchen. When the sea monster makes his escape, he also breaks her favorite salad bowl.  Now he must raise enough money to fix it, with the boys’ help.

Meanwhile, at the cave, Water Confright, the Sea Monster news anchor creature, announces on the shellovision that there is a curfew ordered for all local monsters. At the same time, in the human world, a curfew is announced by the sheriff because of “teenage trouble” in the area.

Now the boys and Sigmund must sneak out of the house by night, and go down to the monster cave to acquire Sigmund’s savings of fifty clams, to repair the broken salad bowl.

This episode of Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973-1975), at least, doesn’t borrow a plot from The Bugaloos.  Not much more can be said for “The Curfew Shall Ring Tonight” except that Sigmund’s clumsiness again precipitates a misadventure (“Oh, I did it again!” is quickly becoming the titular character’s refrain.). And said misadventure, inevitably takes him, and his human friends, down to the sea caves at Dead Man’s Point for an encounter with the hapless monster family.

There are no new monster suit this weeks, only the some humorous new monster names to chew over. I mentioned Water Confright (Walter Cronkite) above, but we also learn that the monster sheriff of Dead Man’s Point is Sheriff Shrock.

Perhaps the most interesting thing about this episode, and the series overall, is the mirror premising. What happens in the human world is almost always reflected in the tale by what is happening in the monster world. The value of this mirror premising, if it isn’t apparent, is that we see how family fears, and problems, even loves and losses, are all the same, regardless of species differences. Some families may consist of “monsters” to the eye, but be totally recognizable in terms of human foibles and phobias. In a weird way, this is a 1970’s affirmation of diversity. Sigmund’s family may consist of monsters, but they have feelings too, right?

Another truly intriguing aspect of this episode.  The episode seems to be a variation on a poem from 1867, Rose Hartwick Thorpe's "Curfew Must Not Ring Tonight."  That's a remarkably obscure literary reference to be included in a Saturday morning series about sea monsters!

Next week: “Sweet Mama Redecorates.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: "Ghoul School Days"

In "Ghoul School Days," Sigmund decides to run away, so he won't cause the boys any more problems. He is afraid of getting them into trouble and wants to "make it on his own." 

Meanwhile, the monsters in Sigmund's cave are visited by the principal of the Ghoul School,  who warns them that Sigmund has not been showing up to school. According to sea monster schools, at least one child per family must attend school. If Sigmund doesn't return, then one of the other brothers -- or Big Daddy -- must go in his place, and that's something they don't want to do.

Now, two sets of brothers must find Sigmund! 

Well, there's a problem here. Last week's Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973-1975) was a rehash of a Bugaloos episode. And this week, we get another rehash from the same Sid and Marty Krofft series.  In "Today I am a Firefly," Sparky (Billy Barty) runs away from his friends in the Tranquility Forest to prove he can make it on his own, and not be a burden. That is exactly Sigmund's journey this week.

Beyond this issue, however, the episode is not bad. We learn for instance, that Zelda's last name is Marshall...the same name as the stranded family in the Marshall series Land of the Lost (1974-1977).  Is Zelda related Rick, Will and Holly?  I'd like to think so.

Also, this episode gives the audience a new monster costume, for the Ghoul School Principal.  The monster looks like a sea monster school marm, and the costume must have come at some expense to the production.

There's also a Godzilla joke here, keeping with the idea of a culture of diverse monsters (supported by episodes featuring the Wolf Man, and The Frankenstein Monster). In this case, Mr. Godzilla is Sigmund's home room teacher.

Finally, as usual, the episode ends with Johnny singing only a tangentially-related song (another hold over from The Bugaloos).

Another notable aspect of this episode: Walker Edmiston, who plays Enik in Land of the Lost appears this week, out-of-costume, which is a rarity in Krofft lore. I interviewed Edmiston back in the year 2000, and he was one of my favorite interviewees.  He would break out into various character voices during the conversation, and was a true gentleman.

Next week: "The Curfew Shall Ring Tonight."

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: "Monster Rock Festival" (1973)

In "Monster Rock Festival," Sigmund listens regularly to a popular radio show and decides to participate in a new contest to win prize money. The sea monster writes and performs his own song for the show, as "Swinging Sigmund," and to his surprise, wins the contest.

This victory creates two problems for Sigmund, Johnny (Johnny Whittaker) and Scott (Scott Kolden). 

The first problem is that the radio disc jockey wants to meet Sigmund in person, so he can record him singing his song live.  Of course, if the D.J. meets him, that would reveal Sigmund's identity as a sea monster.

Secondly, Sigmund's villainous family wants in on the action, and decides to put on its own (bad) musical show.

This episode of Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973 - 1975) feels like a call-back -- or perhaps a left-over teleplay -- from an earlier Sid and Marty Krofft live-action Saturday morning series: The Bugaloos (1970 - 1972).  

As you may recall (hopefully from my blog posts), that cult-TV program involved teenage rock singer/insect people living peacefully in "Tranquility Forest," and facing constant jealousy from Benita Bizarre (Martha Raye). Benita wanted to be a musical star, but didn't have the chops to succeed. Most episodes involved her stealing the songs or talents of the Bugaloos so she could become famous.

In "Monster Rock Festival," the same dynamic exists. Sigmund writes and performs a song that wins a contest, and faces jealousy from the villains of this series: his family.  In fact, this story was actually the plot of The Bugaloos episode "Our Home is Our Hassle," in which the firefly Sparky (Billy Barty) won a radio song-contest sponsored by the Tranquility Forest D.J., Peter Platter.

So if this story feels familiar, there's a good reason. Still, at least this week's plot is a little different from the repetitive Sigmund and the Sea Monsters fare of late, even if it seems ported in from another show.

Next week: "Ghoul School Days."

Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: "The Nasty Nephew" (November 3, 1973)

In "The Nasty Nephew," Zelda (Mary Wickes) brings over her nephew, Leroy (Stephen Ciccarelli) to play with the boys for the weekend. Unfortunately, Leroy is a sour-puss, and not easily impressed. He hates surfing and doesn't want to play.

When Zelda suggests that Johnny (Johnny Whitaker) and Scott (Scott Kolden) show Leroy the Club House, they realize they will have to hide Sigmund from the interloper. They offer to induct Leroy into "The Octopus Club," but even that doesn't impress the boy.

While hiding from Leroy, Sigmund is captured by his family, and the boys must rescue him. Leroy gets trapped in the cave, and also requires rescuing by Scott and Johnny. In the end, however, Leroy meets Sigmund, and agrees to keep his secret.

In "The Nasty Nephew," a familiar plot is regurgitated, with Sigmund once more captured, and requiring a rescue from his human buddies. This is the plot every week, with an interlude to the cave, and a visit to the sea monster family.

This episode ends with a song, "Keeping a Secret," which sees Johnny dating a new girlfriend (not Pamelyn Ferdin's Peggy, alas.)  This ending montage has nothing to do with the rest of the episode, save for Leroy's agreement to keep Sigmund's secret.

The sea monster-sub-plot this week sees Big Daddy visited by an auditor from the government (a new sea monster suit!) who accuses him of tax evasion. Apparently, Big Daddy claimed Sigmund as one of his deductions, and now that Sigmund has left the cave, there is no proof Big Daddy cares for him. "You let my tax deduction get away!" Big Daddy yells at his other sons. 

Next week: "Monster Rock Festival."

Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: "Happy Birthdaze" (1973)

In "Happy Birthdaze," Zelda (Mary Wickes) plans to throw a birthday party for her intended beau, Sheriff Bevans (Joe Higgins). She has baked a birthday cake, and has a wonderful evening planned for him. Zelda asks Johnny (Johnny Whitaker), and Scott (Scott Kolden) to clean the house in preparation. Sigmund, meanwhile, wants to do something nice for his friends, and plans to clean the house himself.

Alas, it is also Big Daddy's Birthday, and the brothers are asked to clean the cave by Sweet Mama. They don't want to clean it, however, and decide to abduct Sigmund and make him clean the cave instead.  They attack Johnny and Scott's house, make a royal mess, kidnap Sigmund, and take the sheriff's birthday cake too.

Now the boys must retrieve their friend and the cake, before Zelda's big night is ruined.

The fifth episode of the live-action Sid and Marty Krofft series, "Happy Birthdaze" showcases well the the formulaic nature of the series. The format is well-established already.  In each installment, the sea monster family kidnaps one of the protagonists, whether it is Johnny, Scott, or Sigmund, and the others must figure out how to rescue them from the cave.  Some lame deus ex machina helps the protagonists save their friend.

In previous weeks, we have seen Johnny dress as the Frankenstein Monster, or the surprise arrival of the Wolfman. This week, Johnny uses a tape recording of a tsunami to scare the monsters out of their own cave.  The tape recorder gag even recurs in a future episode ("The Dinosaur Show.")

Outside the formula, this episode features an amusing scene of Sigmund's encounter with a persistent mail-man, who wants to deliver a package to Zelda's house. Sigmund is inside, and must pretend to be Zelda, all while not letting him in.

Next week: "The Nasty Nephew."

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monster: "Is There a Doctor in the Cave?"

In “Is There a Doctor in the Cave?” Sigmund has fallen ill with a stomach ache. This isn’t the first time he has had one, and he tells his friends Johnny (Johnny Whitaker) and Scott (Scott Kolden) that he used to take medicine at the cave.  That medicine consists of melted jellyfish and warm squid milk. 

Realizing they must help their tentacled friend, Johnny sneaks into the cave, only to learn that Slurp also has a stomach ache, and is taking the same medicine. Johnny attempts to steal the medicine for Sigmund, but is captured in the process.

Fortunately, the Wolf Man shows up at the cave, and the Sea Monsters think he is Scott, trying to pull a repeat of last week’s “Frankenstein” stunt. The Wolf Man goes mad with rage, giving Johnny the opportunity he needs to escape with the medicine that Sigmund needs. 

Afterwards, Johnny gets stood up on his date with Peggy, and sings a song.

“Is There a Doctor in the Cave?” to its credit, remembers the series history of Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973-1975). By that I mean, last week the Frankenstein Monster visited the sea monster cave, and was proven to be an imposter. This week, when the real Wolf Man appears at the cave (his car broke down near the beach…) he is assumed to be an imposter, instead of the real thing.  

Of course, the real question here isn’t continuity, but why this series has taken a weird turn to feature the Universal Monsters.

This episode features another odd movie reference. The sea monsters’ family physician is named Dr. Cyclops, but acts like Harpo from The Marx Brothers, and has the same type of mop-top.  Another pop culture joke: The sea monsters like the Wolf Man western they watched, titled “High Moon.” Gary Cooper most definitely does not star.

The last act of “Is There a Doctor in the Cave?” comes out of nowhere. Sigmund is nursed back to health, and suddenly we learn that Johnny has a date with Peggy, who was played, two episodes back, by Pamelyn Ferdin.  She stands him for that date, and Johnny sings a sad song, which ends the episode.  This interlude has absolutely nothing whatsoever do with the previous twenty-two minute narrative. It’s just a weird set up for the weekly song.

Next week: “Happy Birthdaze.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monster: "Frankenstein Drops In"

In “Frankenstein Drops In,” Sigmund’s brothers -- Blurp and Slurp -- along with his father, Big Daddy, lament that there is no one left to clean up the cave for them, since Sigmund left. When they see Scott (Scott Kolden) on the beach, they decide to capture him and make the boy their servant.

When Johnny (Johnny Whitaker) and Sigmund learn what has occurred, they sneak into the cave and realize it will be impossible to rescue Scott without a distraction. When they see the sea monsters watching The Monday Night Super Monster Movie, “Frankenstein Goes Ape,” they get an idea. Johnny dresses up like the Frankenstein Monster, Big Daddy’s idol, visits the cave as a friend, and asks to take Scott back as his slave.

Unfortunately, the sea monsters soon realize the gambit, and try to capture Johnny too.  Johnny, Scott, and Sigmund are able to make a quick escape together.

As is often the case with Krofft series of the 1970s’, this series is getting weirder the longer it goes. 

In this episode, Scott is made a slave by Sigmund’s family, and the monster-loving sea monsters get a visit from a being they presume to be the Frankenstein Monster, though he is constantly referred to as Frankenstein by the episode writers.

The insertion of “famous” monsters into the series mix is an odd choice, to say the least. After all, this is a series about sea monsters living in a cave at the beach. But in this episode and the next one, two Universal Monsters appear: the Frankenstein Monster and the Wolf Man. The Creature of The Black Lagoon might have made more sense, given the aquatic nature of Sigmund’s family.

Most of the humor this week derives from the sea-monster-flavored entertainment on the cave “Shellovision” as reported by the brothers.  Big Daddy sits down to watch his favorite series, “Ghoul in the Family,” And later, the sea monsters complain to the Frankenstein Monster about the quality of one of his films: “Frankenstein Meets Gidget.”  

One genuinely funny moment sees Scott express surprise about being captured by Sigmund’s family, and Big Daddy notes, “Well, we ain’t the Partridge Family.”  Of all the early 1970’s Krofft shows, Sigmund and the Sea Monsters is the one that appears most obsessed with disco decade pop-culture. Today, this quality of the series makes it a kind of time capsule for early 70’s generational touchstones.

The overall narrative here, not surprisingly, doesn’t make a lot of sense. Scott is captured right off the beach, and dragged to the monster cave, to be a slave. After escaping the cave together, Scott, Johnny and Sigmund go right back to the exact point he was captured, and linger there long enough to sing a song.  If I were them, I would have waited to sing that song, until getting back to the clubhouse.  At any minute, the monsters could have reappeared from their (nearby) cave and grabbed them again.  

The sea monsters are a dangerous threat only until the writers decide they are not.

Next week: “Is There a Doctor in the Cave?”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: "Puppy Love"

In “Puppy Love,” Johnny (Johnny Whitaker) and Scot (Scott Kolden) drive Sigmund home to their Clubhouse in their “Ecology Wagon,” but he falls out on the street, and is nearly discovered by a neighbor, Peggy (Pamelyn Ferdin), and her dog, Fluffy.

Back at the Clubhouse, Sigmund confesses his love for Fluffy, despite their different species. Johnny, meanwhile, as a crush on Peggy.

Meanwhile, back at the cave, Big Daddy Sea Monster hatches a plan to bring Sigmund home at lat. Slurp will dress up as the Sea Monster movie star, Diana Demon, and lure him home.

Things take a dramatic turn at the Clubhouse, however, when Zelda (Mary Wicke) sees Sigmund there, and mistakes him for a ball of sea weed. She sweeps him up and puts him in the trash. A trash truck takes Sigmund way, and now it is up to Fluffy to find Sigmund and help him come home.

In “Puppy Love,” the second episode of Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973-1975), Sigmund falls in love with a dog, and has his heart broken when Fluffy, the object of his love, decides only to date within her own species. This subplot is mirrored by the one involving Johnny and Peggy.  At the end of the episode, Johnny sings a song about falling in love, and being rejected.

Perhaps the most interesting thing to note about this episode is that it guest stars Pamelyn Ferdin, a child actress who starred in literally everything, it seems, in the late 1960’s and early 1970’s. In the sixties, she guest starred on Star Trek (1966-1969) in “And the Children Shall Lead.” And in the seventies, she was widely seen on Saturday morning television, including programs such as Shazam! She was one of the leads in Filmation’s Space Academy.

This is the episode in which Archie Bunker knock-off Big Daddy calls one of his sons “Meathead,” Archie’s favorite put-down of his Polish son-in-law, Mike Stivic (Rob Reiner). Big Daddy’s plan this week involves Sea Monster pop culture, and a sea monster matinee idol that Slurp dresses up as.  The plot doesn’t work any better than it sounds.

Still, at this point, Sigmund and the Sea Monsters is a fun watch. It isn’t as loud or frantic as Lidsville, and the characters are more interesting than those found in The Bugaloos.

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging; Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973-1975): "The Monster Who Came to Dinner" (September 8,1973)

Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (1973-1975) is the first live-action Sid and Marty Krofft Saturday morning series to run more than one season. The program ran for two seasons and nearly thirty episodes on NBC, though its record for broadcast was soon usurped by Land of the Lost (1974-1977), which ran three years and forty three episodes.

Sigmund and the Sea Monsters remains beloved by young and old alike, and was recently re-booted for a six episode run on Amazon Prime. The original seventies series follows the adventures of two young brothers, Johnny (Johnny Whitaker) and Scott (Scott Kolden), who live near a beach, and discover a friendly, diminutive  sea monster named Sigmund (Billy Barty) near “Dead Man’s Cove.”

The boys bring him back home to their clubhouse. Notably, Sigmund is unlike the other sea monsters of his kind, because he doesn’t want to frighten people. Having run away from his family of origin, he finds a new family with Johnny and Scott, though he must stay hidden from the family housekeeper, the stern Zelda (Mary Wickes).  Johnny and Scott’s parents are “away” and never seen throughout the series.

Over the weeks and seasons, Sigmund’s sea monster family tries again and again to bring him back home (in part so the family’s rich uncle Siggy, Sigmund’s namesake, will leave the family his inheritance when he dies), and fail repeatedly.

The first episode of the series, “The Monster Who Came to Dinner,” establishes much of this premise. It begins with the boys carrying Sigmund home to their clubhouse on a surf-board, and nearly being run-over at a road intersection (a scene in the opening montage)

Meanwhile, Sigmund’s sea monster world is simultaneously established back in his family’s cave. The gruff, insulting Big Daddy (Sharon Baird) is voiced by Walker Edmiston, and is an obvious knock-off of All in the Family’s (1972 -1979) bigot-in-residence, Archie Bunker, right down to his memorable catchphrases “Dingbat,” “stifle” and (in the episode “Puppy Love,”) even the put-down “Meathead.”  One of the brothers, meanwhile, sounds exactly like Jim Nabor’s beloved Gomer Pyle, from the series of the same name (1962-1964).

We learn in this episode of the Krofft series that the monsters have “Shellovision” (instead of television) and watch their favorite channel: MBC (Monster Broadcasting Company.)  The series they watch in this episode is a knock-off of Sanford and Son (1972-1977) called “Serpent and Son.”  Since Sigmund and the Sea Monsters aired in 1973, both the Sanford and All in the Family references would have been considered very timely and relevant when the series first aired.

“The Monster Who Came to Dinner” may be Sigmund, himself, who nearly ruins a home-cooked dinner between Zelda and her beau, the local sheriff, Bevins (Jim Higgins), or it may be his namesake, Uncle Siggy, who comes to the family cave and is upset that his favorite sea monster, Sigmund, is nowhere to be found.

This episode, like so many episodes of Sigmund and the Sea Monsters ends with a song, sung by the boys.  In this case, the song is “Friends.” 

Next week, episode two: “Puppy Love,” but in the meantime, here’s a look at one series theme song:

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Monster Squad "Albert/Alberta" (1976)

In “Albert/Alberta” the Monster Squad combats a villain who is half-man/half-woman: Albert/Alberta (Vito Scotti).

This nefarious fiend is using a highly-advanced laser weapon to melt the polar ice and cause a second great flood. 

Meanwhile, he plans to convert his ship, the Mezzo-Mezzo, into an ark carrying two of every animal species…including vampire bats and werewolves.

Dracula and the Wolf Man sneak aboard Albert/Alberta’s ship and attempt to reverse the melting of the ice, but they are captured and Albert/Alberta plans to tear them asunder inside his weird device, “The Great Divider.”

Fortunately, it’s Frankenstein to the rescue…

Monster Squad (1976) comes to an end with Victor/Victoria…er “Albert/Alberta.”  The episode is the same sort of nonsense we have been treated to in previous weeks: an unimaginative, thoroughly derivative regurgitation of Batman’s high-camp TV adventures, right down to the threat of the week (in this case, the Great Divider), the notable villain, and the final tussle.

I’ll be honest, re-watching all thirteen episodes of Monster Squad in 2014 has been a bit of a chore, but I wanted to do it because I loved the show in 1976, and felt it was great that the long-forgotten Saturday morning series was getting a DVD release. 

I appreciate all the performers on the show -- particularly the actors who play the monsters -- because they gave the production their all, even when the props department, the sets, and the writers let them down.  I especially like Henry Polic II as Dracula.  He’s always been my favorite performer on the series, and despite the high camp, his take as the count is indeed memorable.

If you watched Monster Squad back in the 1970s, I recommend that instead of watching the series from start to finish, you instead rely on your no-doubt foggy memories and affection of the series. Pick out two shows, perhaps, to revisit.  I would recommend “Ultra Witch” (with Julie Newmar) and perhaps “The Tickler.”  If you’ve seen one episode of Monster Squad, you’ve pretty much seen them all, so try to pick the top of the formulaic heap…

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Monster Squad: "Lawrence of Moravia" (1976)

In “Lawrence of Moravia,” an Arab super-criminal -- the aforementioned Lawrence (Joseph Masoli) --plans to steal a famous pearl the size of a basket-ball from the Belgravian Embassy. 

The Monster Squad attempts to stop the villain, but Frankenstein and the Wolf Man are captured and locked inside a vat of boiling oil…

It’s not always so great to go back and revisit a TV series that you enjoyed as a kid. 

For one thing, as a kid (with relatively little viewing experience…) you don’t notice bad performances or lousy production design, or a campy tone so much.

And for another thing, as a kid, you aren’t necessarily aware of social stereotyping or other bothersome factors.

Watching Monster Squad (1976) today, in 2014, is a weird and uncomfortable reminder of how bad kid’s TV could be in the 1970s.

Fortunately, that awareness is balanced by knowledge that other Saturday morning series were far superior to this one. 

The general lousiness of Monster Squad thus serves to remind us that Sid and Marty Krofft (Land of the Lost) and Filmation (Ark II, Jason of Star Command, Space Academy) deserve some credits for not actively attempting to insult our intelligence.  Their programs are filled with great concepts, and don’t talk down to kids.

And in terms of social stereotypes, a Monster Squad episode like “Lawrence of Moravia” just doesn’t hold up by today’s standards.  Lawrence -- an Arab super-villain – is accompanied by two henchman who are clearly Caucasians painted in swarthy make-up.  Yikes. I hate political correctness as much as the next guy, but there's a difference between being politically incorrect and being offensive.

And at the end of the episode, Walt has occasion to speak with Officer McMacMac, the Irish night-watchman at the Wax Museum.

Naturally, McMacMac speaks in a thick Irish brogue, and in his own way is as bigoted a portrayal of the Irish as Lawrence is of Arabs. We all know that cops are always Irish, right?

McMacMac also looks and sounds like a direct knock-off of Batman’s Chief O’Hara.

Of course, the seventies were a different time, with different standards and different mores.  It’s important to remember that. Accordingly, I don’t believe anybody was setting out to depict Arabs or Irishmen in stereotypical terms.   But it still happened.

Both characters prove my point, simply, that you can’t go home again.  You can’t re-visit Monster Squad now without seeing and register some overt flaws, or without acknowledging that time has passed it by.

To wit, the series’ approach to superheroes -- high camp -- is insulting.  And the sense of humor is pretty antique. In episodes like “Lawrence of Moravia” and “No Face” (with Chief Runny Nose…) the humor is borderline insulting.

Next week: the last episode of Monster Squad: “Albert/Alberta.”