True confessions: I
loved, loved, loved, loved this movie.
When I was six years old.
Each time Jack H. Harris's Dinosaurus! aired on the local TV station in 1975 or 1976 (I can't remember whether it was WPIX or WWOR...), I was there.
I was there with my
plastic dinosaur toys clutched in my hands and my Aurora dinosaur model kits
(built by my Dad) in tow. You couldn't drag me away from the TV.
Seriously.
I was deep in my
extended dinosaur appreciation phase when this movie was making the TV
rerun rounds, and Dinosaurus! -- in case the title
didn't give it away -- is a film all about a Tyrannosaurus Rex and Brontosaur.
These giant lizards wake up on an isolated island in the tropics in 1960 and
promptly wreak havoc until a visceral man vs. nature coup de grace with
a bulldozer
Next to King
Kong, Godzilla, The Last Dinosaur, or The Land That Time Forgot, this was as good as it got
for kids in the seventies pre-Star Wars.
Today, the film simply doesn’t have much
appeal. Time has passed it by, which, ironically, is the movie's theme.
Dinosaurus! (don't forget the exclamation point, please...) concerns an
American construction company working on the Virgin Islands to build a new
harbor for the locals. The "locals," by the way, consist of Irish
drunks, a Cuban villain called Hacker, and his French-sounding henchman, not to
mention assorted Latinos and black extras. Oh, and lest I forget, there's also
a mental midget named "Dumpy," who -- for some reason never
explained -- is allowed to handle heavy machinery (not to mention Molotov Cocktails).
One day, a lovely and plucky gal named Betty (Kristina Hanson) happens into the harbor in a motorboat while hunky construction team leader Bart Thompson (Ward Ramsey) is detonating explosives nearby. An explosion knocks Betty's picnic lunch into the water, and she dives in after it.
Unfortunately, she finds
not lunch, but a giant hibernating Tyrannosaur. It appears to be dead -- or
mostly dead, anyway -- but is "perfectly preserved." The
explanation given is that there's a cold subterranean channel down there, just
off the beach.
In the tropics?
The construction workers
then drag the dinosaur out of the sea, up to the beach alongside a companion: a
perfectly preserved brontosaur.
"One look at them
and you'll never forget them!" declares one
character in description of the dinosaurs. He's right, of course. Because when
lightning strikes the slumbering dinosaurs (as well, apparently, as a
slumbering cave man...), the behemoths come to life and begin walking the
island in full view.
And once you've seen them...I promise, you won't
forget them, either. The special effects were created by Wah Chung
and Gene Warren (who later collaborated on Land of the Lost), two
greats of the film industry, actually. They do great work on a
budget, and for the time. And yet, to go back to the kind of comment I made
this week about Ray Harryhausen’s Valley of the Gwangi, the effects
don't really hold up very well today, even though I appreciate the 1960s era
artistry.
Soon, the unfrozen cave
man, played by Gregg Martell, is exploring the island. Right off the bat, he
finds a hatchet and ends up smashing the only working radio in a thousand
miles. He also confronts a 20th century woman in rollers and facial lotion...and
runs screaming away like a little girl.
This is the film’s idea of comic relief.
Today, it plays as very juvenile.
While the Neanderthal goes in search of his two unfrozen buddies, the islanders -- led by Bart and Betty -- team up and decide to make a last stand at the local ruins. They dig a moat around an ancient fortress and wait for the tyrannosaur to show up. Meanwhile, local politician and villain, Hacker thinks he could get rich off the Neanderthal...
So, we have a comment here about avarice and greed in a capitalist system. Or that may be giving Dinosaurus! too much credit.
Before Dinosaurus! has ended, there's a noble self-sacrifice on the part of the cave man, the brontosaur fails to elude fate, and ends up dying in quick sand, and Bart goes mano-e-mano with the T-Rex from the seat of a bull-dozer.
He doesn't exactly say "Get
away from her, you bitch," but Bart utilizes the mechanical
device to duel the dinosaur to a standstill, clubbing the beastie off a high
mountainside with the scoop bucket. Young Julio, who had befriended the Neanderthal,
is sad, but Bart explains to him how confusing it can be to wake-up with a
million-year hangover.
Imagine you woke up one day in the twenty-first century, Bart offers, by way of explanation, to Julio.
Or, if you are me --
seeing this movie for the first time in forty something years -- imagine
you were a kid and loved this movie and then woke up one day in the
twenty-first century to realize how ridiculous and silly the whole thing is.
Because that's what happened with Dinosaurus! I told one of my friends I was going to watch the movie and how much it had meant to me as a child, and he said something along the lines of "why are you going to do that? Why do you want to ruin good memories?"
Unlike, say King
Kong (1933) or Godzilla: King of Monsters (1956)
- Dinosaurus! doesn't really hold up to adult scrutiny.
It's a perfectly adequate time-waster and B movie, but I can't make any
arguments for the artistic merit of the film, and boy does that bum me out. I
wish I could write a review about how the movie goes beyond its 1960s context
to speak to us, here, directly in the twenty-first century.
I will always feel
fondly about Dinosaurus! because it was a movie I loved and needed at age
six. I also understand, as an adult,
that nostalgia and quality are two different characteristics. I have long felt nostalgia about Dinosaurus!
but that doesn’t mean it is a quality film worth revisiting today.
Still, as the movie started to play on this viewing, I felt a funny pang.
I wished I had my old plastic
dinosaurs and model kits in hand for the experience.
I hate this film.
ReplyDeleteOk......?
DeleteI remember seeing this, kinda, when I was around 6 or 8ish in the theater, right around '63 perhaps?
ReplyDelete