At Flashbak: Die Hard on the Tube: Five Times Cult-Television Ripped Off the Bruce Willis Classic

This week at Flashbak, I looked at five of the most blatant cult-TV knock-offs of the Bruce Willis action classic, Die Hard. (1988).

Here's a snippet and the url (http://flashbak.com/die-hard-tube-five-times-cult-television-ripped-off-bruce-willis-classic-37924/):

"John McTiernan’s film Die Hard (1988) was, without a doubt, one of the most influential productions of its day. In the years after Bruce Willis -- as John McClane -- defeated Alan Rickman’s Hans Gruber in a terrorist-infested skyscraper, the action genre changed shape to imitate the film’s 

crowd-pleasing formula.

What was that formula? 

In short, all Die Hard knock-offs featured the same elements.

These include an isolated location, one cut off from help. 

Similarly, these films feature a hero left to his her own devices in that location, working alone and with only the resources on hand.

And finally, these films always include a gang of villains taking over that location with lots of semi-automatic weapons. The mission of these villains usually involves a heist of some type.

Movie-makers soon gave audiences Die Hard on a battleship (Under Siege [1992]). Die Hard on a jumbo jet (Passenger 57 [1992]), Die Hard on a Train (Under Siege 2: Dark Territory [1994]), Die Hard on a Bus (Speed [1994) and even Die Hard in a sports stadium (Sudden Death [1995]).

At home, cult-television creators promptly took notice of the Die Hard formula’s popularity. Episode-after-episode of genre TV series now rushed to feature a Die Hard episode, bringing the hit film’s formula to the small screen. 

Here are five memorable examples of Die Hard on the Tube."

Continue reading at Flashbak.

From the Archive: The Five Creepiest Clowns in Cult-TV History

Coulrophobia is the acute fear of…clowns.  

But why be afraid of clowns at all?  

After all, clowns are merely slapstick circus performers garbed in ridiculous accouterments (zany wigs, over-sized shoes, red noses, and pale white pancake-make-up faces…).  They are designed to appeal, through their outrageous behavior, to delighted kids. 

Right?

Yet children -- perhaps more than any of us -- often detect something dark and sinister in the clown aesthetic. 

Is it the inhuman skin palette?

The desperate desire to please, or to garner a laugh? 

The unavoidable perception  that -- underneath that painted, gigantic smile -- the performer isn’t really smiling at all?

Certainly, horror movies such as Killer Clowns from Outer Space (1988), Out of the Dark (1989), and Vulgar (2000), among others, have exploited the seemingly universal human fear of clowns.

But movies are not alone in spot-lighting this monster or “boogeyman.”  In cult-television history, scary clowns have also long been a staple of storytelling.  The circus or carnival is a frequent setting of popular genre series (including The Evil Touch, The Fantastic Journey, and Tales from the Crypt), and clowns have appeared again and again to terrorize our slumber. 

Below are my personal selections for the five creepiest cult-television clowns.  Your mileage may vary.

5. The Servants of the Gods of Ragnarok (“The Greatest Show in the Galaxy,” Doctor Who [1988 – 1989])

This story during the era of the Seventh incarnation of the famous Time Lord (Sylvester McCoy), overtly involves coulrophobia. In particular, the Doctor’s young companion, Ace (Sophie Aldred) is terrified of clowns. This is a fear the Doctor -- in his unofficial and ongoing role as her therapist -- hopes to disabuse her of.  Together, the duo decides to visit the Psychic Circus on the planet Segonax.

The truth behind the strange circus, however, is that the malevolent chief clown and his mechanical clowns actually serve the Gods of Ragnarok, beings who feed off of entertainment. 

After encountering these terrifying clowns and defeating the Gods, the Doctor determines that he doesn’t like clowns very much, either…and who can blame him?

4. The Ceiling Clown (“Dead Letters,” Millennium [1996 – 1999])

Chris Carter’s Millennium is a series rife with horror imagery of all varieties, and all of it artistically and beautifully wrought. In the third ever episode of the series, young Jordan Black (Brittany Tiplady) experiences a terrifying nightmare involving a clown.  But this being Millennium, it isn’t your normal, garden-variety clown. 

On the contrary, the briefly-seen clown is creepily perched -- like a hanging spider – from a ceiling in the Black household.  This clown is the stuff of nightmare fodder because though its body is oriented downwards (hanging from the ceiling), its head and face are upside down (or by our perspective, right-side up…).  This final bizarre touch -- the clown head at odds with the positioning of the clown body -- is just incredibly upsetting.

In the case of “Dead Letters,” the clown is almost a throwaway character, and separate entirely from the main story, which involves a serial killer.  But the disturbing dream imagery of the clown makes the viewer aware that there is something very dark and very menacing stalking suburbia.

I remember watching this episode on first run in 1996 (in my mid-twenties) and having visions of that hanging clown before I went to sleep that night.  I would love to see a Millennium movie with a full-grown Jordan experiencing visions of that clown again, and requiring the help of her father, Frank Black (Lance Henriksen) to exorcise them. Or imagine if Jordan’s child suddenly began having a vision of that ceiling clown, and it summoned up a memory in Jordan…

3. Pennywise the Clown (It [1990])

The dreadful Pennywise emerges from the amazing imagination of horror icon Stephen King and his novel It, and is performed in this TV-movie by the legendary and incomparable Tim Curry.

Here, the dreadful clown -- actually some kind of hideous spider-creature -- feeds on the imagination of several youngsters and friends, terrorizing their waking hours and their sleep.  Curry is at his malevolent best in this role, and internalizes the character of this monster to a truly frightening degree.

In fact, when one thinks of evil clowns, Pennywise is perhaps the one name that leaps to mind immediately.  

Many would no doubt place this beast first on this list, but I have reserved the top two slots to TV clowns who disturbed me even more....

2. The Holographic Clown (“The Thaw,” Star Trek: Voyager [1996])

It’s one thing to be confronted with a scary clown in daylight, or even in nighttime. It’s quite another thing, however, to face a clown that can control reality, and re-shape the world to his bizarre, surreal, and disturbing taste.  That’s the very entity (Michael McKean) encountered by The U.S.S. Voyager in this brilliantly-crafted second season episode titled “The Thaw.”

Here, several alien scientists are trapped in a holographic world run by this malevolent clown...formerly but a figment of the computer system, but now sentient.  While their consciousness visits the realm of the clown, however, the scientists’ bodies slumber in suspended animation.  But one “life” impacts the other, as the clown learns, and he boasts the power, quite literally, to scare his victims to death.   Die in the hologram, and you die in reality…of a massive coronary.

Before long, this dark clown gets his hands on two Voyager crew-members -- Torres and Harry Kim -- and Captain Janeway (Kate Mulgrew) must face him on his terrain, where he possesses all the power and all the advantages.  Janeway’s only weapon to fight back against the the capricious, vengeful, monstrous creature is to show no fear whatsoever…no matter what macabre sights he shows her.

If there is such a thing as Hell -- a place where your life is no longer your own and reality can be reshaped to terrify you and make you suffer – then “The Thaw” does a creepy great job of imagining it. Hard to believe this frightening tale is an episode of the family-friendly Star Trek franchise.  It’s one of Voyager’s underrated gems, and worth re-visiting.

1. Pippo the Clown (“The Clown,” One Step Beyond [1960]).

I hadn’t even been born yet when John Newland’s paranormal anthology was broadcast for its original network run.  Instead -- as a teenage insomniac in the mid-1980s -- I encountered reruns of the series at 2:00 am, in syndication on a local channel. 

I remember watching the series during that twilight time -- when the rest of the world slept -- and feeling (in admittedly paranoid fashion…), that I was the only one watching; that somehow these stories were meant just for me.  

One of the most chilling and unnerving One Step Beyond stories was the second season entry, “The Clown,” starring a very young Yvette Mimieux. 

In this tale, a mean, jealous husband, Tom Reagan (Christopher Dark) grew so enraged at his wife’s kindness to a carnival clown that he murdered her…with the clown’s own scissors.  Although Pippo the clown was then framed for his wife’s murder, Reagan faced a new and unexpected terror.  Every time he looked in a mirror, he would see the clown -- still in costume and turned implacably murderous -- looming nearer…

This tale of vengeance and cosmic justice meted actually engenders sympathy for the rotten Tom because his punishment is so terrifying.  Pippo, the buck-toothed, silent clown, appears in rear-view mirrors and the like, and finally threatens to drive the man to an early death.  “The Clown” is visualized in moody black-and-white, expertly directed by Newland, and Pippo never speaks or utters a word of explanation, anger or remorse for his campaign of terror.

Instead, his rage-filled eyes -- seeking their quarry by blackest night -- convey his sinister emotions.  There’s a relentless, inevitable, driving quality about Pippo’s vengeance that, in my opinion, renders him the scariest clown to ever cross our TV screens.

At Flashbak: Rock and Roll vs. The Press!

Another of my Flashbak articles this week gazed at the never-ending conflict between rock and roll stars and the press.  In particular, I looked at the rock-movie trope of "the press conference."

Here's the url and a snippet (http://flashbak.com/rock-roll-stars-vs-press-5-rock-movies-saw-journalists-rock-stars-collision-course-35354/ )

"Whether you’re watching a real life rock documentary, or a movie about a fictional rock band, there’s one scene the films probably have in common: the press conference, or failing that, the interview scene. 

In scenes of this type, the artistic and activist pontifications of celebrity rock stars run smack up against the precepts of cynical journalism, and the results aren’t always pretty.

The tradition or movie convention of rock stars vs. the press probably begin with the fictionalized Beatles movie, A Hard Day’s Night (1964).

There, Ringo Starr is asked a very important question by one reporter. Is he a “mod” or a “rocker?”  The famous answer, of course, is that he is a “mocker.”  

(Continued at Flashbak)

At Flashbak: You Have Been Summoned to Galactic Court (Space Heroes on Trial)

At Flashbak this week, I remembered ten instances in which TV's space heroes stood trial.

Here's a snippet and the url (http://flashbak.com/summoned-galactic-court-ten-times-favorite-space-hero-went-trial-35115/  )

"Even in space, the ultimate enemy is…the court system.  Throughout science fiction TV history, the greatest heroes of all time have faced this litigious menace, standing trial and running up against a judicial system bent on destroying them.

To put it another way, the success of Perry Mason (1957 – 1966) has had an undeniable ripple effect on space adventure TV, as odd as that seems. 

Even in the final frontier, there are judges, juries, witnesses, and attorneys.  Even in the distant reaches of space and time, viewers are fated, it seems, to hear such exclamations as “objection, your honor!” or warning phrases like “this is highly irregular….but I’ll allow it.”

Gazing across the space TV canon, one can see how every space hero worth his or her salt has been wrongly accused of a crime, and cast into alien and draconian brands of justice and punishment. Seeing so many episodes featuring space age heroes standing trial, decade-after-decade, franchise after franchise, one sees that these entertainments are pondering the shape and breadth of justice in a new setting; one of technological breakthroughs and new morality.

Below are at least ten occasions in sci-fi TV history in which heroes went before a jury of peers to stand judgment for their “crimes.” 

Continued at Flashbak.

At Flashbak: Evil Record Companies!

This week at Flashbak, I remembered the most evil record companies in rock movie history.

Here's a snippet and the url (http://flashbak.com/none-black-five-evil-record-companies-movie-history-34857/ )

"The most evil force an aspiring rock’n’roll group can face is…the record company.

Now, one might believe that record companies are would be-saviors: plucking singers from obscurity, signing new talent and making dreams come true. 

But if rock’n’roll movies have told us anything over the decades it’s this: be afraid.  Be very afraid of the corporate record company.

Frank Zappa’s Baby Snakes (1979) warned us about a real record company (Warner Bros.) but movies about fictional rock bands have often adopted the same approach, again and again casting the corporate cronies of record companies as a force destructive to both creativity and long-term success.

Here are five of the most evil record companies in rock movie history..."

Read the rest at Flashbak!

At Flashbak: The Simpsons’ Top Five Movie Parodies of the 21st Century

The second article I wrote for Flashbak this week involves a piece of conventional wisdom that I truly dislike.  I know you've heard it, or read it.  It goes like this: The Simpsons used to be great; but now it sucks.

After watching the last seven or so seasons with my son, Joel, I can assert differently, I feel.  This article takes on that particular conventional wisdom.

Here it is (http://flashbak.com/simpsons-top-five-movie-parodies-21st-century-34148/ )

"If you want to, you can read all the conventional wisdom that is available all over the Net.

The Simpsons (1989 to present) has -- for at least the last several years -- been a mere shadow of its former (great) self.

The truth is somewhat more complicated than that criticism, of course.

The Simpsons began its TV life during the First Bush presidency over a quarter century ago as a caustic cartoon satirizing American middle class families and their values. In that era, family comedies were everywhere (Family Ties, The Cosby Show, Roseanne, etc.) and The Simpsons was an alternative to the idealized programming.

After about a dozen years or so in that format -- not to mention over two-hundred episodes – the central premise, a cartoon family as real American family, was pretty adequately played out, and The Simpsons by necessity had to evolve.

And what it became is something truly wonderful and unexpected.

The Matt Groening-conceived series transformed from sitcom parody/corrective into an absurdist, gag-a-minute, post-modern, meta-commentary on all-things pop culture, from YA novels to iPhones, from politics to Internet etiquette.

Furthermore, the series took pride in focusing on its remarkable supporting cast -- Ned Flanders, Moe, Chief Wiggum, Mr. Burns, Smithers, Nelson, Skinner, Otto, Apu, Grampa, Krusty, Milhouse, Patty and Selma -- to such a degree that it thrives to this day, in many senses, as the best developed such ensemble on modern American television.

We hear all the time from the audience who started with the show back in the late 1980s.  They observe that the series is a shell of its former self, when the truth is that The Simpsons is a different animal than it once was. And in some ways, it’s a far more entertaining, far more inventive program.

Perhaps then, the series deserves to be judged based on what the program continues to be, not how it began twenty-seven years ago.  

One way to judge the conventional of declining quality is to look back over the last fifteen years -- the years of the twenty-first century -- and remember some of The Simpsons’ greatest movie parodies. These shorts (often featured on the Treehouse of Horror specials) remind us that the stories hasn’t missed a step, and remains the funniest series airing on network TV..."

Continued at Flashbak.

At Flashbak: Fantastic Files: The Forgotten Genre Magazines of the Seventies and Eighties

This week at Flashbak, I looked back at some of the more obscure or forgotten genre magazines of the seventies and eighties.

Here's a look (http://flashbak.com/fantastic-files-forgotten-genre-magazines-seventies-eighties-34093/ )

"The 1970s and 1980s – the pre-Internet Age -- witnessed the rise of so many great genre magazines. Starlog and Fangoria were two favorites of mine, and publications widely read and appreciated by fans. Also popular at the time was the long-established (and beloved) Famous Monsters, and the scholarly Cinefantastique.

But the seventies and eighties also witnessed the rise and fall of many other great magazines that, today, don’t have the same recognition as these titles.

For example, one of Starlog’s primary competitors, at least for a time, was Fantastic Films, which was published by Irv Karhmar and the Blake Publishing Group.

This magazine featured amazing, in-depth interviews with the most important talents of the era (from Charlton Heston to Glen A. Larson) as well as a great reader’s page called “Reaction.”  The magazine sold for $2.00 an issue, sometimes featured “a giant color poster” inside, and often looked back at classic films and TV series. 

Fantastic Films was published from 1978 to 1985, before it went under, but I cherish my collection 

of issues today for the scholarly, wide-ranging interviews, and intriguing think-pieces, including an analysis of sexual imagery in Alien [1979] that completely opened up new and provocative readings of the Ridley Scott classic.  In some ways, Fantastic Films was every bit the equal of Starlog, except in terms of its longevity.

In the mid-1980s, the Psi-Fi Press and Movies Publishers Services, Inc., published a series of “spotlight” magazines on film and television, called “Files” Magazines.  There were Files magazines devoted to Star Trek (1966 – 1969), Doctor Who (1963 – 1989), The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (1964 – 1968) The Prisoner (1967), James Bond, The Avengers (1961 – 1969) and even V: The Series (1985).  Each issue featured an introduction, a part of an on-going episode guide, and interviews with on-screen talent and behind-the-scenes. I always felt that these magazines made a great point: that TV shows -- their artistry, storytelling, and production -- were worth writing about..."

Continued at Flashbak!

At Flashbak: We Don't Need Other Worlds; We Need Mirrors

One of my articles at Flashbak this week looks at a question I tackled on the blog too (in regards to Interstellar [2014]).  

In particular, my post looks at sci-fi films that feature the "ultimate trip," but find at the end of the universe not aliens, but...home.

Here's a snippet (and the url: http://flashbak.com/dont-need-worlds-need-mirror-six-sci-fi-movies-took-ultimate-trip-home-33564/)

"In Stanislaw Lem’s 1961 novel, Solaris, one character observes that humans have no need of other worlds, and that our world, Earth will “suffice.” 

Why?

Well, Lem’s writing suggested that man had not yet explored the “dark passages” of his own psyche, and therefore any attempt to explore other worlds would butt up only against his own closed mind. 

On distant other worlds, the author imagined, we would see only a crack’d “mirror” that reflects our nature, not something truly alien, something truly different.

Uniquely, some of the most admired and thought-provoking science fiction films of past decades have adopted the same creative tack.

When the protagonists in these daring cinematic visions travel to the farthest regions of space and existence itself, they meet not with something truly alien, but with something, instead of Earth.  The “alien” is wrapped up not in the unknowable, but the familiar objects and symbols of home.

With that thought in mind, here are six films that embarked upon “the ultimate trip” only to end up, finally, bringing audiences firmly back down to terra firma."

At Flashbak: Sci-Fi on the Cross: The Crucifixion Pose in SF Film and TV

At Flashbak, a brief survey of the Crucifixion pose as it has appeared in sci-fi film and television.

Here's a snippet, and the url: (http://flashbak.com/sci-fi-cross-crucifixion-pose-sf-film-tv-33293/ )

"In Christian belief, there are few symbols more powerful than that of the crucifixion. By going to his death on the cross, Christians believe, Jesus redeemed the human race. He delivered mankind from the penalties of sin. 

Throughout science fiction film and television history, the crucifixion pose -- the symbol of Jesus’s suffering and sacrifice -- has frequently been deployed to suggest the concept of meaningful and profound sacrifice.

Now, Jesus figures appear throughout sci-fi and TV history, in probably dozens of films. In John Carpenter’s Starman (1984), for instance, the alien played by Jeff Bridges descends to Earth and then -- after being human for a short time -- ascends to the stars.  But this article looks specifically at those incidents in which characters recreate the crucifixion pose on film..."

Another Flashbak: Mano a Mano: Six Times Cult-TV went to the Arena

Another Flashbak I wrote recently has also been published and I wanted to ask you to check it out. This one remembers all the TV versions of Fredric Brown's 1944 short story "Arena."

Here's a snippet and the url (http://flashbak.com/mano-a-mano-six-times-cult-tv-went-to-the-arena-31946/)

"Fredric Brown’s short story "Arena" was first published in Astounding Science Fiction Magazine in 1944.  It concerned a space war between two equally matched forces: the human race and the aliens known as "The Outsiders." During the last battle of the war, a human pilot named Carson is miraculously plucked from the cockpit of his one-man scouter and teleported to an arena of blue sand and bizarre, speaking lizard creatures.

He is contacted there by an omnipotent alien who informs him that the space war will not be settled here and now.  Carson is then forced to combat a deadly alien representative of the Outsiders, a repellent, round organism called "The Roller.”

If Carson loses this vital contest, mankind stands to be wiped out of existence. If Carson wins the fight,

Although author Brown was not aware of it when he penned this classic tale during the World War II era, his vignette would one day become, like The Most Dangerous Game, one of the most cherished "stock" stories in science fiction TV, especially throughout the sixties, seventies and eighties...." (Read more at Flashbak).

At Flashbak: Kid Catastrophes: The Recycled Space Toys of the 1970s and 1980s

My latest article at Flashbak looks at space-centered toys from the 1970s/1980s that were actually just recycled toys from earlier product lines.

Here's a snippet, and the url: (http://flashbak.com/kid-catastrophes-recycled-space-toys-1970s-1980s-32039/ )

"There is nothing worse for a kid than getting a new toy only to find that it is, actually, an old toy. 

Specifically, that your new treasure is one that appears to be from your new favorite outer space movie or TV series, but is actually just a recycled old toy given a paint job and a few new details.

Alas, this happened to kids of the disco decade all the time.

It was a great age for toys in general, and for the science fiction genre on film and television too, but some toys still proved to be huge disappointments.

The recycling of old toys and slapping a new name on them is a procedure that every major toy company of the day used, apparently, and just about every popular franchise you can think of fell victim to it.  Although this post doesn’t begin to scratch the surface, here are a few of the more memorable recycled toys of the era." (read the rest at Flashbak!)

At Flashbak: Survival of the Fittest: Ten Times Cult-TV Played the Most Dangerous Game

My newest article at Flashbak looks at the various TV adaptations of the short story "The Most Dangerous Game."

Here's a snippet and the url: ( http://flashbak.com/survival-of-the-fittest-ten-times-cult-tv-played-the-most-dangerous-game-31743/ )

"In 1924, author Richard Connell’s short story “The Most Dangerous Game” (also known as “The Hounds of Zaroff”) was published in Colliers. 

This literary work depicted the frightening tale of Sanger Rainsford, a hunter and New Yorker who ended up stranded on the island home of exotic (meaning “foreign”) General Zaroff and his mute-servant Ivan. 

As Rainsford soon learned, Zaroff was a hunter too, but one who had grown tired of standard game. The hunt had come to bore him. 

At least, that is, until he sought new prey: human-beings. 

Ship-wrecked sailors, in fact, became his the general’s new quarry.  In an attempt to be sporting, Zaroff always offered his human prey a fighting chance. If they could elude him on his wild island for three days, they would be allowed to leave alive and well. 

If they didn’t…well, they would be killed.

And as Rainsford learns as the story develops, no sailors have ever survived Zaroff’s hunt.

The Most Dangerous Game became an RKO movei in 1932, starring Fay Wray and Joel McCrea,, and was unofficially adapted in the 1960s (with Robert Reed) as Bloodlust (1961).

By the mid-1960s, however, cult-TV shows of all stripes were deploying the Most Dangerous Game template or trope -- hunted humans and an evil hunter -- all the time.

Here are ten memorable examples of the Most Dangerous Game adapted to cult-television..." (Continued at Flashbak).

At Flashbak: Here’s the Story: The Brady Kids Do Horror and Sci-Fi!

My latest piece at Flashbak looks at the post-Brady Bunch sci-fi/horror TV career of the Brady Kids. It's a list that includes Isis, Bigfoot and Wildboy, A Vacation in Hell and...Megapiranha.

Here's a snippet and the url (http://flashbak.com/heres-the-story-the-brady-kids-do-horror-and-sci-fi-tv-31449/)

"After the cancellation of The Brady Bunch (1969 – 1973), the actors who played the Brady kids got their own (short-lived) variety show, and at least two additional prime time spin offs: 1981’s The Brady Brides and 1990’s The Bradys.

But between such gigs, the actors (all except Susan Olsen -- Cindy) turned to guest appearances on science fiction and horror television, some on Saturday mornings, and some in prime-time.

Here’s a look back at the highlights..." (cont. at Flashbak).

At Flashbak: Snow Bound: A Survey of Ice Planets at the Movies and on TV

I wrote my latest article at Flashbak last week, while we were in the throes of snow and ice, snow-days and delayed openings.

Here's a snippet and the url: (http://flashbak.com/snow-bound-a-survey-of-ice-planets-at-the-movies-and-on-tv-31247/ )

"Much of North America, particularly in the northeast, is currently digging out from one of the worst winter storms since the great blizzard of 1978. 

Schools are closed down, some roads are impassable, and the grocery store shelves are bare. 

I write this article, in fact, on a snow day here in Charlotte, N.C, as the ice slowly starts to melt outside my home office window.

I’ve decided to take this unexpected holiday from work to recall some of the great frozen worlds from sci-fi TV and movie history.

This isn’t a complete list, of course, though it hits the hot -- or cold? -- spots.

And remember, the subject is frozen or snow planets, not merely snow environments on diverse planets (which means that fan favorites like The X-Files [“Ice”] and Game of Thrones) don’t exactly fit the bill."