Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "Misery Loves Company" (December 5, 1992)

While Tasha continues to go through “the terrible twos” and make a pest out of herself by ruining Annie’s paintings, Stink fakes a sprained ankle so he can get out of helping Kevin repair the tree house roof.

Later, Tasha and Kevin turn the tables on Stink and pretend to be injured…

The very last episode of this iteration of Land of the Lost (1992 – 1993), “Misery Loves Company” is a series low-point, which is saying something given the lackluster quality of episodes such as “Cheers.”

This whole half-hour revolves around a cranky baby dinosaur, Tasha, a lazy Paku, Stink, and the series’ most irritating, unlikable character: Kevin Porter.

“Misery Loves Company” features no sense of urgency, no outside menace, and no real narrative direction, even.  Instead -- and as I mentioned last week -- the series plays like a sitcom or situation comedy instead of a fantasy adventure. 

Admittedly, the sitcom was a highly popular commercial form when the series aired in the early 1990s, but the uninspiring format is such a disappointment to those who grew up with the adventurous 1970s version of Land of the Lost.  After the thrills of that series, this Land of the Lost feels inconsequential, dominated by directionless, irrelevant material.

It has been many weeks since there was any real sense of danger on the series, and this is despite the fact that the Porters live in the middle of a jungle with dinosaurs, an angry renegade cyborg, Sleestak and other threats. 

Despite the locale, and the denizens, the series writers’ have not been able to marshal the resources to present a good or imaginative science fiction or fantasy concept in weeks, or even a compelling story that involves a clash between the Porters and the other inhabitants of the land of the lost.

And so this two-season remake ends rather poorly, having failed to dramatize memorable or important stories, or even boast a leitmotif like the original’s statements about environment and community. 

Instead, this Land of the Lost concerns itself with pratfalls and jokes, like the damaged roof spilling water onto Kevin’s head.

Sometimes perspective is everything, and so I would note that if you go into this series expecting a family-oriented situation comedy involving Pakuni and dinosaur hijinks, you likely won’t be disappointed by what you get. 

But if you grew up with the Marshalls and the original Land of the Lost, you’re going to find the lack of ideas and the lack of real intelligence in this remake a quality that is virtually impossible to overcome.

This final episode of the series ends without a final appearance by Christa, the most appealing character on the series, and with another cameo appearance of Timothy Bottom’s Mr. Porter.  The series also ends with the Porter family stuck in the land of the lost.

But in this case, being stuck in the land of the lost -- with a car, with a video camera, with a boom box and the other amenities of home -- is hardly a cause for concern, let alone interest.

It’s sad that this series had two full seasons to develop a mythology and universe, but it settled instead for moralistic tripe about drunk driving (“Cheers”) using firearms responsibly (“Make My Day”) and so forth.  

The 1990s Land of the Lost thus goes down in the books as a wasted opportunity, and as a pale echo of a far superior originator.

I never got to see the series in its entirety when it aired and so I had always been curious about it.  But now that I have watched every episode, I’m not at all certain it was time well-spent. 

If I had to recommend a few episodes, the individual titles to check out would be: “Siren’s Song,” “Kevin vs. The Volcano,” “Flight to Freedom” and “Dream Maker,” which is arguably the best episode in the entire run.

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "Sorceress's Apprentice" (November 28, 1992)

In “Sorceress’s Apprentice,” the sorceress Keela (Adilah Barnes) gives Annie her spell book for safe keeping. 

Alas, Kevin also wants to use the book’s magical powers and tries to steal it from his sister.  Mr. Porter warns Kevin to quit it, but soon Kevin enlists Stink’s help in the task.

Later, Shung -- leader of the renegade Sleestaks -- gets his hands on Keela’s valuable grimoire and transforms Mr. Porter into a turtle. 

Annie gets the book back, and must practice her own magic to restore her imperiled father.

When Keelah finally returns to claim her spell book, the sorceress informs Annie that using such magic properly takes years of practice….

If you’ve been reading my reviews of the 1990s Land of the Lost the previous couple of weeks, you’ll understand why I write now that I’ve all but given up on the series. 

“Sorceress’s Apprentice” provides no reason for restored faith. The story is more aptly a situation comedy than a fantasy adventure, and once more the use of magic goes thoroughly unexplored. Magic is just a gimmick here, a vehicle for comedy moments like Annie turning Kevin’s hair a bright red, or Dad being transformed into Kevin.

Sadly, Keela never explains how the magic of her world operates in the Land of the Lost. We never know the source of the magic, and in many cases, Annie doesn’t even seem to be reading from the spell book while performing the magic. Instead she just says nonsense words and magical things miraculously happen.  It’s all like a first grader’s idea of casting spells.

The whole idea of magic in “Sorceress’s Apprentice” is totally unexplored and so Keela’s line that “there are rules” for it is laughable. This episode establishes no such rules, or even the groundwork for rules.  Here, it looks like anyone -- Annie, Kevin, or Shung -- can cast spells simply and easily, without study, without preparation, without, even, gathering ingredients for them.

Instead, the episode wants to teach a lesson about responsibility. Annie must use the magic responsibly, if she hopes to master it. That’s not a bad message, but it doesn’t exactly work with all the comedy pratfalls and jokes.

Meanwhile, Timothy Bottoms has effectively become a guest-star on his own series, and Mr. Porter appears only briefly here to talk to Kevin sternly, and to get transformed into (in order), a turtle, Stink, Kevin, and the Cyclops nemesis of Keela. 

Once more, there is no reason given for the fact that Annie causes these transformations while trying to restore her Dad to his original form.  It just happens, and is supposed to be funny…but isn’t.

Still, at least this episode has some threat, in the form of Shung. Like Kevin, he wants to possess the spell book and so makes some trouble for the Porters.  

The next episode of the series, “Misery Loves Company” doesn’t offer even that much.

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "Cheers" (November 21, 1992)

In “Cheers,” Stink finds a grove of fruit trees.  There, the fruit has fermented…having an alcoholic effect on him.  When Kevin realizes that Stink is “hammered,” he decides to partake of the berries as well.

Later, Kevin works up the courage to ask Christa out on a date, but feels like he needs a boost.  He returns to the fruit grove and gets drunk again.  He then crashes the Porter’s car into a tree, and misses his date with Christa.

Embarrassed, Kevin asks Stink to lie for him.  Stink does so, but is wracked with guilt.  Meanwhile, Mr. Porter suspects that Kevin is not telling the truth about the accident.

So, this is what it comes to.

We now get a Land of the Lost episode -- set in a prehistoric jungle, mind you -- about the dangers of drinking-and-driving. 

At one point, Kevin even says “Lucky I had my seat belt on,” so as to work in another lecture about proper teen behavior.  (When driving intoxicated, be sure to fasten your seat belt…).

I realize, of course, that this is a kid’s show, but kids sure as hell know when they are being talked down to, and when a TV program is making a point at the expense not only of entertainment, but of credibility too.

In particular, the final “message” -- as delivered by Kevin -- is cringe-worthy: “I thought that fruit would solve my problems. But it only made bigger ones.”

And that’s your sermon for the week.

“Cheers” is all wrong for a lot of reasons.

Other than the truly bizarre idea to vet a drunk-driving tale in a world of dinosaurs and only one motor vehicle (!), the episode corrupts the character of Christa (Shannon Day). 

Kevin asks her out, and she suddenly -- as though brainwashed -- this woman of the jungle, who has survived on her own since childhood, becomes a fawning school girl.

Before this episode Christa has never shown more than a passing interest in Kevin as a friend. His affections have always been unrequited.

But now suddenly she just wants to be his girlfriend?

That’s certainly a change…and not a good one.

As bad as the moralizing about drunk driving surely is, the episode’s montage -- which cross-cuts Christa and Kevin prepping for the big night -- is even worse.  Kevin pops a zit, and Christa puts on lipstick. It’s all just…unspeakably awful and dumb.

It is easy to romanticize the original Land of the Lost (1974 – 1977) if you grew up with it, but as I’ve written before, those stories were largely about something relevant…or at least interesting. The stories on the old show had an environmental feel, with the Marshalls acting as shepherds of the land, and some episodes dealt nicely with emotions such as loneliness, or home-sickness, or even mourning.  Those episodes had a curiosity about Physics, mythology, and history, and science fiction.

The new Land of the Last stories like “Cheers” may aggressively feature a point, but they tend to have no depth or curiosity.  As a result, the stories practically disintegrate before your eyes as you watch.

The good news?  Only two episodes of the remake series to go…

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "Make My Day" (November 14, 1992)

In “Make My Day,” Kevin goes around with a water pistol shooting Tasha and Stink.

Meanwhile, Tasha is teething, and chewing up Mr. Porter’s shoes in hopes of diminishing the pain.

After Kevin is attacked by the Sleestaks, he learns that Stink has discovered an ancient but highly-advanced gun in nearby ruins. It’s no ordinary gun, either, but a “light gun.”

Dressing up in a camouflage head-band and sun-glasses, Kevin decides to confront the Sleestak with the highly-advanced weapon.

But Shung wants the weapon for himself…

With only a handful of episodes remaining in its run, the remake of Land of the Lost (1991 – 1992) begins its final descent from mediocrity into downright rottenness. Although this episode is still better than the segment I’ll feature next week (“Cheers”), it is almost uniformly dreadful.

Here, Kevin finds a highly advanced Sleestak hand-gun that even the Sleestaks don’t recognize as being representative of their technology. They act like they’ve never seen it, even though Kevin observes the gun has Sleestak writing on it.

Then -- angry because the Sleestak are stronger than he is -- Kevin suits up for battle with the lizard people, and shoots the ground around them…making them dance.

At this juncture, Stink notes that “Sleestak have no rhythm,” a low-point for the Paku character.

Kevin has had so many low-points in the series, but “Make My Day” provides him with several more.  He spends the episode quoting dirty Harry (“Go ahead Sleestaks, make my day…”) and comes across as borderline psychotic as he notes that he “owns the jungle.” 

Porter is creepy as all get-out in this episode and all I can say is…we need to talk about Kevin…he needs an intervention (as “Cheers” also makes plain).

But here’s the really disturbing thing about this episode: “Make My Day” seeks to wring comedy out of its pretty frightening premise -- that a teenager finds and starts using a discarded gun.

Sadly, this premise doesn’t even work in terms of series continuity.  Where does Kevin get khakis, sun-glasses, head-bands and the like? 

And where does he find enough of that gear to outfit Stink as well?

Furthermore, why don’t the Sleestaks recognize their own technology?  And where did these ruins come from?  We’ve never seen them before in the series, but nobody comments about them in the body of the episode.

Next week: scraping the bottom of the Land of the Lost barrel with “Cheers.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "Annie in Charge" (November 7, 1992)

In “Annie in Charge,” the Porters learn that termites are decimating the support logs for the family tree house.  Kevin and Mr. Porter head into the jungle to get more wood, leaving Annie in charge on the home front.

Unfortunately, Kevin and Mr. Porter experience amnesia after being exposed to a future cyborg’s toxic nerve gas. 

When the same cyborg captures Christa and drags her inside the craft, it’s up to Annie -- still in charge -- to save the day. Her only weapon is Tasha’s horrible singing voice…

“Annie in Charge” is that old TV standby, the amnesia story. 

This familiar tale has been featured in many cult-television series including The Adventures of Superman (“Panic in the Sky”), Star Trek: The Next Generation (“Conundrum”) and Buffy the Vampire Slayer (“Tabula Rasa.”)

In stories of this type, protagonists unexpectedly succumb to amnesia, forgetting their identities, and facing a crisis without benefit of personal experience. 

In this case, Mr. Porter and Kevin don’t remember who they are, where they are, or even who Annie is.  The episode resolves a bit anemically when the amnesia simply “passes” and everything is back to normal again.  Not even a mallet to the skull is required, alas…

The other plot strand in this episode involves, as per the title, Annie, and her experience taking care of Tasha and Stink and rescuing Kevin and Mr. Porter.  The episode starts out by showing Annie as a wee bit power hungry.  “Chop, chop!” she shouts, acting the role of drill sergeant, as a drum riff is heard on the soundtrack. 

But once real danger is in the offing, Annie devises a plan to outsmart the cyborg and rescue Christa, using Tasha as a (very loud…) distraction.

Although not as weak as some episodes of the new Land of the Lost (1991 – 1992), “Annie in Charge” raises more questions than it answers. 

For instance, how did the Cyborg (first seen in “Future Boy”) manage to survive his plunge off a mountain top? 

Secondly, if his spaceship is here – and we see it in this episode – then how come the Porters don’t try to commandeer it and escape?  Wouldn’t they at least want to get inside?

Finally, “Annie in Charge” finishes up with no mention of the termite problem, or the effort to replace the tree house’s support logs. It’s as if the whole thing never happened.

Still, in total, this is a harmless if undistinguished segment.

Next week, things take a turn for the worse with: “Make My Day”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "In Dinos We Trust" (October 31, 1992)

“In Dinos We Trust,” Kevin (Robert Gavin) is caught spying on Christa (Shannon Day) while she goes for a swim in the pool where dinosaurs and other natives bathe. 

When Christa catches him peeping, Kevin is embarrassed and blames Tasha for not keeping a good look-out.

But after Kevin is blinded by snake venom, however, he must depend on Tasha to get him home to the compound safely…

There's no nice way to say it. Kevin Porter is the least likable and most irritating character on the remake of Land of the Lost.  In fact, there exists a whole sub-group of episodes about the fact that he is a jerk, and that his wanton jerkiness causes problems for him, his family, and his friends.

These episodes are “The Thief,” “Opah,” and this week’s not-so-good installment “In Dinos We Trust.”  Usually, Stink is the subject of Kevin’s wrath or harassment, but here it is innocent Tasha. 

Yes, he bullies the baby dinosaur.

Once more, Kevin does something bad or anti-social -- in this case ogling Christa while she swims -- and instead of weighing his own culpability for his behavior, he lashes out at someone else. He blames Tasha for the fact that he got caught.

Just once, it would be nice to see Kevin pick on somebody his own size, but in always targeting Stink or Tasha, Kevin comes across as a real bully. Someone very good at picking fights with little creatures who can't defend themselves.

As was the case in “The Thief,” “In Dinos We Trust” ends with Kevin recognizing the error of his ways, and apologizing or his behavior. He apologizes both to Tasha and to Christa, but this episode proves he doesn’t really learn from his mistakes. Maybe the third time's the charm.

But the bottom line is that Kevin is deeply unlikable as a character.

In terms of story, “In Dinos We Trust” is a big waste of time, but buttressed by a few nice visualizations. 

At one point, we see a brontosaurus in the wading pool, and it is convincingly rendered for 1990s, pre-Jurassic Park (1993) effects. At another juncture, Kevin and Tasha visit the “Valley of Death,” a graveyard for dinosaurs, and it too is nicely visualized.

Next Week: “Annie in Charge.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "Siren's Song" (October 24, 1992)

In “Siren’s Song,” The Porters, Stink, Tasha and Christa go back to the beach to visit Namaki, the mer-man they met a few episodes back, in “Life’s a Beach.” 

While resting, however, the Porters encounter a crisis.  Annie (Jenny Drugan) disappears without a trace, and Mr. Porter (Timothy Bottoms) blames himself.  Of late, he has been thinking of his dead wife, Natasha (Marta Du Bois), and how he spent more time focusing on his career than on his family.

The Porters and Namaki go in search of Annie, and Kevin finds her in a dark grotto, mesmerized by a siren that has taken the form of their mother.  When Kevin is ensnared by this witch as well, Mr. Porter must save the day. 

The siren’s true form -- that of an old crone -- is revealed, and she is freed from her imprisonment in the grotto once she acknowledges her own guilt, and once Namaki defeats her guard...a monstrous dragon.  

“I was once a beautiful woman,” she reveals, but was so obsessed with her beauty that it became more important to her than her own family.

Having exorcised that demon -- just as Mr. Porter exorcises his -- the siren finally goes free.

Many episodes of the 1991 – 1992 Land of the Lost remake bear a close resemblance to episodes of the 1970s version.  This week’s entry, “Siren Song” is a case in point.  The installment plays like an echo of the original series episode “Album,” which saw Will (Wesley Eure) and Holly Marshall (Kathy Coleman) ensnared by a Sleestak trap that took the form of their dead mother.  In that case, the “siren” appeared in a cave, or grotto, much as she does in “Siren’s Song.”  The close replication of details regarding the Siren’s disguise (as a deceased parent) and her location (in a cave…) can’t be coincidence.

The resemblance to “Album” is worth noting, but it doesn’t severely undercut “Siren Song’s” value as one of the better entries in the remake’s second season.

For one thing, there is a sturdy literary antecedent at work here, and Annie Porter mentions it explicitly: Homer’s The Odyssey, and Odysseus’s encounter with the monstrous sirens.  This is a nice touch.

For another thing, the siren has appeared frequently throughout cult-television history, in series as diverse as Space:1999 (“Guardian of Piri”), Star Trek Voyager (“Favorite Son”) Millennium (“Siren”) and even Batman and Smallville.  The siren is thus a legitimate cult-tv “monster,” and in Land of the Lost she is well-cast indeed. 

Marta Du Bois plays the siren both in beautiful human form, and in scary old crone form. Long-time TV fans will remember Du Bois from her memorable turns on Tales of the Gold Monkey (1982), Star Trek: The Next Generation (“Devil’s Due” [1990]) and Voyagers.

Also, finally, “Siren’s Song” provides some much-needed background detail about the Porter family. We not only meet a specter of Natasha, the dead matriarch, but we get a little bit of insight about Mr. Porter’s life before he arrived in this strange world.  Apparently, he was a workaholic and a bit of a narcissist too, traits he shares in common with the life-form banished to the grotto.  The episode “Future Boy” even makes note of this, when Annie tells the boy from 2062, Simon, that her father used to “work all the time.”

I enjoyed this episode of the remade Land of the Lost more than many because of its attention to character, and because of its call back to franchise history, and more than that, TV history.  Du Bois is also, perhaps, the most notable (and welcome…) guest star of the entire remake catalog.

Next week: “In Dinos We Trust.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991 - 1992): "Future Boy" (October 17, 1992)

In “Future Boy,” Annie Porter (Jenny Drugan) laments the fact that her father (Timothy Bottoms) treats her like a child.  Annie believes she is fully able to handle herself, even considering the perils of the jungle.

One day, while exploring the wild alone, Annie spots a teenage boy, Simon (Danny Gonzalez), who suddenly materializes nearby. He has been in some kind of temporal collision with a menacing alien cyborg, one that is “bigger, meaner and smarter” than a T-Rex.   

After knocking out Scarface, the cyborg hones in Simon, hoping to steal his time belt, the device that has allowed the boy to transport from the year 2062 all the way back to 1992.  

Protecting Simon from harm, and defeating the cyborg (who has a flaw in his “thermal vision,”) Jenny proves to her Dad that she is capable of defending herself.

“Future Boy,” like “Day for Knight” or “The Sorceress” is a story about a visitor who comes into the Land of the Lost, helps teach the Porter a valuable lesson, and then is on his or her way.

No muss, no fuss.

A woefully familiar tale, “Future Boy” doesn’t feature much that is new, or of interest.  Annie already met a teenage contemporary in the aforementioned “Day for Knight,” and in this story, she and Simon basically commiserate about the fact that their parents just don’t understand them.

In terms of visualizing the story, Simon’s costume – a silver jump-suit -- is the most clichéd “look” imaginable in terms of futuristic garb.

On the other hand, Simon does check a wrist device at one point in “Future Boy “and does the equivalent of “googling” information to learn about his nemesis, the Cyborg. 

That nice touch -- anticipating the Internet and the easy availability of information on the Web -- makes up for the trite costuming selections.

Another interesting factoid: Simon is from San Francisco, which becomes an island following an Earthquake in the year 2047, according to this episode.  Since the Porters, Christa and Simon are all from San Francisco, viewers might theorize that there is a long-standing link between S.F. and the alien world depicted on the series.

I mentioned “The Sorceress” above, and that story landed not only a female wizard in the Land of the Lost, but her cursed nemesis as well, who was depicted by a embarrassingly bad stop-motion monster. 

“Future Boy” resurrects that approach too. 

The Cyborg villain that arrives with Simon looks incredibly silly, and not at all menacing.  He looks like a pig with Borg implants, in particular.

Although “Future Boy” tends toward preachy didacticism with lines of dialogue such as “we need to talk about out our problems. Less blaming, more trust,” it also features a truly funny moment as Simon is introduced to Tasha, the baby dino.

“He’s a time traveler, she’s a dinosaur,” Annie deadpans.

Yep, just another regular day in the Land of the Lost.

Next week: “Siren’s Song.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1992): "Opah" (September 26, 1992)

In “Opah,” the Porters and Stink unexpectedly encounter Stink’s long-lost father, who was believed to have been killed while working as a slave in the Sleestak mines.

This old Pakuni, Opah, quickly gets on Kevin’s nerves, both for his messy and loud nature.

However, when Scarface attacks the Porter compound, the old Pakuni -- and his noise-making flute – more than prove their worth.

There’s a very clear message in Land of the Lost’s (1991 – 1992) “Opah:” Be good to your elders.  Even if your elders are strange and off-putting, they are still worthy of your respect.

Land of the Lost is not the first Saturday morning series to transmit this message. In Star Trek: The Animated Series (1973 – 1974), for instance, the final episode was titled “The Counter-Clock Incident” and show-cased two senior citizens -- Captain April and his wife -- who were forcibly being retired from Starfleet. 

When crisis struck, it was only these two experienced individuals who could save the Enterprise for impending doom. The message was that when you write off older people, you are also writing off a world-view and skill-set that could have relevance and value.

“Opah” is a very similar tale.  Old Opah is easy to laugh at, and promptly becomes Kevin’s nemesis, but finally he is the one who understands Scarface’s dislike of loud sounds, hence the flute. 

At the same time, Stink sees his old father in a new way, and doesn’t feel the need to apologize for his behavior (or smell…).

Just two more brief notes about this particular story:

First, Kevin Porter is again cast as an impatient, intolerant brat in “Opah.”  He is downright rude to Opah, and given Kevin’s behavior in the first season episode, “Thief,” it would be no surprise if Stink never spoke to him again. 

In the original series, Will was also often a thorn-in-the-side for Holly Marshall, but he was rarely so cruel and harsh as Kevin is in “Thief” and “Opah.” Something is off-balance here. I don’t know if it’s the weak writing, which requires Kevin to “move” or “push” the story into a harsher direction, or it’s the intense performances by the actor, which tend to make Kevin seem thoroughly unlikable. 

Secondly, there’s no compelling reason for Opah to continue on his wandering at episode’s end.  He’s found a home with his son (and the Porters), and has gained acceptance.  It’s his choice, of course, to continue his independent life in the jungle, but still “Opah’s” ending feels phoned in.  Opah leaves because the character simply isn’t a “regular.”

So Opah decides to leave, but it’s clear he’s safer and better off with his son, and with the Porters.

Next week: “The Gladiators.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1991-1992): "Dreammaker" (September 19, 1992)

In “Dreammaker,” Mr. Porter (Timothy Bottoms) is unexpectedly awakened from a sound sleep at the tree-house by the sounds and lights of his home in San Francisco. He hears a police siren and sees flashing red and blue lights.  When Mr. Porter looks to see the source of this disturbance, however, he sees nothing out of the ordinary.

The next day, the mystery deepens when the Porters discover a parking ticket left on their truck’s windshield.

When they go exploring, the Porters discover, to their shock, their neighborhood in San Francisco.  They go inside and explore their old house, and find it just as they left it, months earlier.

The Porters return to the house the next day, but strange disturbances soon begin there.  Mr. Porter is attacked by the garage door, the living room furniture comes to malevolent life, and Annie Jenny Drugan) and Kevin (Robert Gavin) receive a telephone call…from their dead mother.

Stink arrives just in time to save the Porters, and soon the family discovers a cave, where an ancient Sleestak device is malfunctioning…

“Dreammaker” is widely-regarded to the finest and most memorable episode of the 1991-1992 remake of Land of the Lost.  There are solid grounds to support of this assessment, as this episode isn’t as content as most to play things safe, and is willing to risk scaring its youthful audience, much in the way that the original Land of the Lost scared its generation in terms of the presentation of the Sleestak, and by featuring monsters like Medusa.

Here, the Porters return to their home in civilization (or so it seems), but this dream quickly turns into a nightmare. The refrigerator comes to life and spits food at Tasha, the furniture attacks the Porter children, and most frighteningly of all, the kids get that phone call from their deceased Mom.  Her soothing tones turn to horrible, malevolent laughter. 

One can imagine how all this horror would play out to the young, impressionable mind, and so “Dreammaker” boasts an aura of danger and fear missing from virtually every other series installment.  That texture of fear is no doubt the very thing that makes”Dreammaker” stand out in the memory of fans.  In short, this is a good creepy show, and even though it recycles the resolution from “Kevin vs. the Volcano” by tagging the anomalies as the result of a malfunctioning Sleestak device, the episode is successful.  Some of its visions -- from the thermostat operating itself, to a sofa going -- up-ended -- towards Kevin and Annie like a hungry shark -- are genuinely spiky.

Still, the episode does raise some questions that the writers don't answer.  For instance, how can the “dream-maker” affect reality outside of the zone where the house is projected?  It seems like it wants to trap the Porters there, yet it can affect them anywhere in the Land of the Lost, as the incident with the parking ticket suggests.  Secondly, why would the dream-making machine warn Stink that the Porters are in trouble by showcasing their plight on the portable television? Perhaps as a lure for the Pakuni?

Still, a little mystery can be a good thing, and I like that “Dreammaker” is willing to go for broke in terms of its horror imagery.  And as a long-time fan of dinosaurs attacking people and civilization, I very much liked the moments in the finale during which Scarface -- the resident T-Rex -- prowls the suburban neighborhood of tract homes and pulps a parked car.

Finally, there’s an interesting Sid and Marty Krofft connection here.  The Porters go exploring because Kevin’s portable television begins to pick up signals of a favorite TV Show, “The Turbo Twins.”  In this case, “The Turbo Twins” are visualized as stock footage from the 1976 Krofft superhero series, Electra Woman and Dyna Girl.

Next Week: back to matters as usual, with “Opah.”

Saturday Morning Cult-TV Blogging: Land of the Lost (1992): "The Sorceress" (September 12, 1992)

In “The Sorceress,” Annie Porter (Jenny Drugan) laments the fact that she possesses no female friend to talk with about boys and other pressing concerns in her adolescent life.  However, when a Sorceress named Keela (Adilah Barnes) appears in the land of the lost, she grants Tasha the power of speech as a way of thanking Annie for saving her life. 

Unfortunately, once she begins to talk, Tasha won’t stop…

Meanwhile, Keela’s deadly nemesis -- a strange Cyclops creature called Magas (Ed Gale) -- also encounters the Porters, and seeks revenge against her.

The second season of the 1991 Sid and Marty Krofft live-action series Land of the Lost commences with “The Sorceress,” a relatively undistinguished episode in the canon.

Like many other stories in the franchise, this installment involves a visitor in the land who interfaces with the Porters, and then parts ways at story’s end, but doesn’t provide any clue about escape.  Here, a world of “magic” is encountered, but not explored in any meaningful fashion, or in any fashion that would help us contextualize the stories better.

What seems missing (and what was abundantly present in the 1970s Land of the Lost) is some underlying theme to the stories that connects them all together, or suggests a way of “reading” the series as a whole. 

The original series concerned four groups, essentially -- the Marshalls, the Paku, the Sleestak, and the dinosaurs – sharing a territory: Altrusia.  When things went wrong in that territory, the Marshalls had to be shepherds of the land, and join with their recalcitrant neighbors to fix things.  It’s not difficult to read this running theme as commentary on being good stewards of the environment.  Similarly, the Land of the Lost was known to be a pocket universe with a sense of balance.

The new series never offers any such specific details, re-hashed or original, that make the episodes cohere into something larger. 

Here, visitors come, visitors go, but there’s no sense of a creator working to some meaningful end, or on some meaningful theme, alas.  That’s the real difference between the two series.  You can compare special effects, performances, and set design, but the 1970s series is unequivocally superior in one sense: it was open to analysis and multiple interpretations. The new series, while entertaining, is not.

The underlying theme in “The Sorceress” involves  the down-side for wishing for something better when what you already have is pretty darn good.  Although Tasha is given the power of speech, she also begins to develop unfortunate character traits.  She has changed from being herself, to being someone new and different, and Annie never reckoned on that fact when she made her wish.

The same idea might be applied to Magas.  He has become a monster because of his power-hungry nature, and has learned nothing from his transformation. He wanted power, and he got it...but now he's little more than an ugly beast.

Although it is interesting to see a character whose inner ugliness is reflected by his outward appearance, Magas may just be the most ridiculous-appearing creature to appear in either iteration of Land of the Lost.

Perhaps the most fascinating aspect of “The Sorceress” is geographical. Keela reports that the dimension gate she traveled through was far, far away in a “great desert.”  So far, viewers have not seen that desert, only the portions of the Land of the Lost depicted by Vasquez Rocks, and the landscape near the compound… that looks rather like a park or nature reserve.

Next week, I’ll review “The Dreammaker,” which is the most-oft remembered episode of the new Land of the Lost, and is widely considered to be the best episode in the remake.